Voices: Gender, transgender, conviction, compassion

Gender and transgender are controversial topics today.

Many have strong opinions and feelings about them that make discussing these issues difficult. We may hope we never have to deal with them in our churches, but we will have to deal with them.

When forming our position on gender and transgender, we study gender in the Bible, where we encounter the creation account of man and woman in Genesis, the purpose of gender in life and procreation, the doctrine of sin, New Testament teachings of grace and love, and bearing one another’s burdens.

Secularly, we review medical research and the heartfelt testimonies of people who say they need gender change.

All these aspects of learning are valid, though we wonder if each has equal weight as we make complex decisions.

Would God want us to put Scripture first, and say, “No” to transgenderism? Do we listen to a suicidal person demanding gender surgery and use surgery and drugs to alter gender to save a life?

Conviction or compassion? Which do we put first, or can we choose both? We think both are possible.

Gender dysphoria and trauma

We can affirm God’s plan for gender, while trying to understand the gender dysphoria—perceiving a mismatch of one’s body and gender—of those who experience it.

Hormones are not the cause of gender questions in childhood, because children have not gone through puberty. Claims of hormonal activity in the womb that may cause gender dysphoria are unproven and will be very hard to prove.

Sex—male and female—is determined by chromosomes. Gender, some medical people say, is fluid and malleable. But not all doctors and psychologists agree on that.

Research shows most people who desire gender change have experienced some type of trauma. If dealing with a transgender situation, we suggest first looking for trauma.

We all have experienced life-altering events that harm and change us. Yet counselors are attuned to events, abusive words and actions—such as bullying and the strong effects of adults and peers on children—that might make the client’s gender undesirable to him or her.

Most of us naturally accept our gender as God’s choice, and we embrace and gradually grow into our male or female identity. We bond with members of our own sex in childhood and come to enjoy our girlhood or boyhood.

All this is graceful and joyful, until it’s not. The “not” is the part many of us do not understand, but to not understand does not mean we label and reject the feelings of people with gender dysphoria. We pray for people in painful crisis and offer skilled help.

Counseling for gender dysphoria

How does a counselor help people with gender dysphoria?

A general mental health assessment is made, and symptoms like anxiety and depression are treated with therapeutic interventions. Developmental stages, family dynamics and socialization are addressed. A treatment plan is created and, if dealing with a minor, parents are a part of decision-making.

It is possible and even probable a client will feel better and come to accept his or her gender, moving on with life. A crisis of identity can be resolved as God works in a person’s life and helps that person understand questions and challenges. We pray for this outcome, supporting and never rejecting the client.

As Christians, we would not recommend irreversible surgery or hormone therapy for gender change, especially for minors or for those who never have experienced puberty. We consider this abusive treatment of children, even realizing some people will choose such surgery or therapy.

Rather than surgery or drugs, we have seen play therapy dramatically influence children’s behavior and recommend it.

The church and transgender

Transgendered people, identity-questioning people, gay people—all people have spiritual needs. Ostracism at church is the last thing they need.

Jesus expects us to minister in his name to anyone truly seeking him. The two of us do not affirm choices and lifestyles that violate God’s clear teachings, but we do affirm souls, and we teach, preach and model God’s ways.

When we do not know what to do, we always will be safe loving people and speaking truth at the right time and as the Spirit gives opportunity.

Our position on gender

God created two genders—male and female. God created humans in his image, knitting us together in our mother’s womb and knowing us before our birth. Our gender was no accident, just like our life was no accident. These truths are not open to debate among Christians.

It is so important to begin in childhood to accept self and others as we are—male or female—no matter how we look or appear, no matter if we are weak or strong, no matter what expectations society places on boys or girls at a young age.

There are many ways to live as a male or female without changing gender. There is a continuum of masculinity and femininity. We are too influenced by sexuality in the media. People can be Christians and not fulfill the role of the macho man or super-sexualized, feminine woman. We need to lose our societal stereotypes about gender. Bullying needs to stop.

Transgenderism is a complicated and personal issue. Many people resist the Christian viewpoint and wish to fight our Bible-based counseling programs that stand on the authority of Scripture.

Yet the Bible teaches us to care for everyone and to be a safe place for them. All of us need to be surrounded by safe people at home, church and school. In Jesus, we can be a safe place.

Transgenderism is real, and we will encounter it in society. In all matters, love and truth must guide us.

Ruth Cook is a cancer survivor and crime victim. Joe Cook is a counseling professor at Liberty University. He holds a Doctor of Ministry from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary and a Ph.D. from Regent University. The views expressed are those of the authors.