DOWN HOME: No pie, low score; still a great trip

A gaggle of good buddies and I recently witnessed an oxymoronic football game.

Knowledgeable fans don’t associate “defensive powerhouse” with “six-man football.” But we managed to choose a defensive donnybrook for our Second Annual Six-Man Football Outing.

OK, truth compels me to admit I chose this particular game during the second weekend of the Texas high school football playoffs.

The same weekend a zillion fellow football fans gathered under the glistening dome of JerryWorld—aka Cowboys Stadium in Arlington —to cheer on several of the top-rated large-school teams, we took the road less traveled.

For decades, I dreamed of watching high-quality six-man football. I first glimpsed that dream when I was a child growing up in Perryton, in the far north Panhandle. A kid in our church went to school in Balko, Okla., just across the state line and home of the Balko Bisons, the premier eight-man football team in Okieland. I loved eight-man football. It’s fast and furious, and teams score a mighty lot of points.

So, when I moved back to Texas 15 years ago, I started tracking six-man football in our dear Lone Star State. I figured it was even faster and more furious than Oklahoma eight-man.

A couple of years ago, I told my friends about how opponents in a state semi-final game combined to score 200 points. “Wanna go sometime?” I asked. They signed up on the spot. So, last year, we watched Walnut Springs win an offensive duel, 65-55. We weren’t disappointed.

This year, we decided the weekend before Thanksgiving would be best for our outing. So, I studied the playoff bracket carefully and then did what most men do: I let my stomach decide.

I’ve never been to Milford or Newcastle. But they were set to play in Hico, home of the Koffee Kup, which serves some of the best burgers, chicken-fried steak and pie on the planet.

Well, driving across Dallas-Fort Worth on any Friday is a chore, and a two-hour trip stretched to three. We were running late, but we still stopped for dinner, and we almost weren’t disappointed. If we’d had time for pie (I lost the “eat pie” vote, 5-1), the meal would’ve been perfect.

We got to the game late, and Newcastle was up, 16-0. When I studied the playoff bracket, I failed to account for the fact that, while these two teams scored a combined 98 points the previous weekend, they held their opponents to a mere 6.

“Yeah, these guys are defensive stalwarts,” a Newcastle fan who kept screaming, “No. 2’s offsides!” explained when we complained about the dearth of touchdowns. Well, great. We came to witness a touchdown a minute, and the final score was only 22-16, with Milford advancing.

Next year, maybe I’ll pick the game between the teams that give up the most points. But knowing me, I’ll probably just choose the game in Hico. And order pie before I eat my burger.