LifeWay Bible Studies for Life Series for May 30: From this day forward

Statistics concerning the rate of failure for marriages in America are discouraging. In many places, for every marriage license recorded, there also is a bill of divorcement recorded. Those numbers fail to tell the entire story, however. In many marriages, husband and wives stay together for religious or cultural reasons. In reality, they are two single people co-existing under the same roof. Can these marriages be salvaged, or are they destined to remain empty? God’s Word has some very specific ideas for transforming these marriages into some wonderful.

Confess and repent (Psalm 51:6-10)

To infer David had marriage issues would be an understatement. This mighty and powerful king of Israel was guilty of adultery. To cover up his sin, David built lie upon lie. He became so desperate, he became an accomplice to murder. Yet David saved his marriage and ultimately became known as a man chasing the heart of God. What happened in David to bring about such a radical transformation?

David understood God to be the God of the second chance. He sought God and begged to be purified so he could know his spirit was free from sin (v. 7). David needed to know he could be made, “whiter than snow” (v. 7). He prayed for God to hide his face from his sin (v. 9). David was consumed with the ideas of grace, “a clean heart and a steadfast heart” (vv. 8–11).

David’s restoration was the result of David’s actions. He sought God, and when he had discovered him, David confessed his sin to God, and he repented of his sin before God. Proper understandings of these two key words are essential to understand the meaning of the focal Scripture passage.

After falling so deeply into sin, David needed to experience God’s love. Knowing full well God had seen his marital indiscretions, he took the only reasonable and logical step necessary for forgiveness. David went before God to offer a plea of guilty. Confession is nothing more than agreeing with God that a certain event occurred.

The second key role is that of repentance. Repentance is a promise made to God indicating desire to move in a new direction. It is a military order to do an, “about face,” and to begin to walk in a new direction. David not only agreed with God concerning his behavior, but he indicated a desire to live differently in the future.

Many broken marriages and those marriages being held together held together by religious and social reason need to have the same spiritual epiphany. The marriage partners need to be strong enough in faith to agree with God that their actions and attitudes are not right. God already knows, but their recognition begins the process of healing. Likewise, marriage partners need to verbalize to each and before God their desire to change their life and to begin to move in a new direction.

Catch the little foxes (Song of Solomon 2:15)

The woman speaking in Song of Solomon 2 is either wise beyond her years or she has experienced enough of life to have unusual understanding. She understands it is “the little foxes” that are destroying the vineyard (Song of Solomon 2:15). Often it is the littlest thing that does the greatest amount of damage.

Interestingly enough most married couples have general agreement on life’s greatest issues. It is the minor things, when left unresolved, which will condemn a relationship. Pressures come in all sizes in a marriage. There are the pressures of money, raising kids, juggling schedules and a dozen other things. Unless couples take the time to deal with these “little foxes” they can become destructive. Too many “little foxes” and the vineyard is destroyed.

Dealing with “little foxes” is a conscious decision. They are similar to weeds. What does it take to grow weeds? Only neglect. Couples must make even the littlest items of discord a priority. They will only grow worse with neglect.

Connect spiritually (Acts 18:24-26; Romans 16:3-5)

Scripture is filled with couples whose marriage was a picture of what God intended the relationship between a man and a woman living in holy matrimony to be. While little is known about them, Priscilla and Aquila seem to be an appropriate model. It was this couple who after listening to Apollos speak, “took him aside and explained to him the way of God more accurately (Acts 18:26).

In a time when the role of women in the church was rarely discussed, it is interesting to note Priscilla being observed in a teaching role, especially where a man of stature is involved. Later, the Apostle Paul notes the work of this couple when he writes to the church in Rome. He says they were, “fellow workers” (Romans 16:3) and he notes they hosted a church, “in their house” (Romans 16:5).

While it is impossible, based on such limited information, to know everything behind the success and apparent marital relationship they enjoyed, it is apparent they were held in high esteem as a married couple. Even in this current age of complexities, it is obvious couples who base their relationship on spiritual criteria have the greatest opportunity for success.

Conclusion

For many years, it was common to see bumper stickers and graffiti that said, “the family that prays together stays together.” It is more than a cute saying. Couples who maintain themselves and their relationship through confession and repentance, who deal with “little foxes” before they become huge issues and who build their relationship on spiritual foundations have the best opportunity to succeed. Such a formula can save a divorce and infuse new energy into a marriage of co-existence.