LifeWay Bible Studies for Life Series for May 23: I pledge you my faithfulness

Adultery and marital infidelity aren’t new behaviors; they are as old as humanity itself. However, the means of becoming unfaithful have changed significantly. With the ready access to the Internet, many are establishing cyber relationships with people they never even have met. The Internet also provides unparalleled access to pornography. Perhaps more than ever before, the church needs to be offering instructions from God’s Word concerning marital faithfulness.

Avoid mental adultery (Matthew 5:27-30)

Many years ago, then Presidential candidate Jimmy Carter gave an interview to Playboy magazine. In the midst of the interview, President Carter confessed to having committed adultery many times during his marriage. Most in the mainstream media were shocked. How could this conservative Southern Baptist deacon and Sunday school teacher confess to such a horrible sin? Carter obviously was using the context of Jesus’ statement, “anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (v. 28) as his point of reference.

To understand Jesus’ remarks requires a proper understanding of lust. Within the confines of Matthew 5:28, lust is the consideration of another person or thing as an object to be used for self-gratification. Absent from lust is any desire to look out for the benefit of anyone other than self.

Many are guilty of using Jesus’ comments only in reference to men. Adultery is as common among women as it is among men. It should be noted however that the impetus for committing mental adultery is different among men and women. Men, more often than not, are lustful for purely sexual reasons. Women tend to lust after other people or things to fill the need for emotional intimacy.

The Internet has contributed greatly to mental adultery. In Matthew 5, Jesus describes an adultery committed by the eyes and the mind. Never in human history has lust found a more fertile feeding ground. Misuse of pornography has become so pervasive nearly one-third of evangelical ministers admit to accessing pornography on a regular basis.

Pornography has an interesting entomology. It comes from two root words, the first, transliterated “porno” means evil. The second root, transliterated “graphy” means pictures. Pornography is in essence evil pictures. The Bible encourages every believer to “flee the appearance of evil” (1 Thessalonians 5:22). While there is much good information to be gleaned from the Internet, believers need to guard themselves from the opportunity for evil by every means possible.

Jesus took this matter of mental adultery very seriously. He uses some of the strongest hyperbole used in the Bible. In essence, Jesus encourages dismembering the offending parts of the body if they are the source of sin. As with all hyperbole, Jesus used the exaggeration to make a point. It would be better to, “lose one body part than for your whole body go to hell” (v. 30). All sin begins in the mind and then is conveyed to the mind for action. It is better to eliminate the source than for the source to continue its contamination.

Find fulfillment in your spouse (Proverbs 5:15-21)

Desire in and of itself is not a bad thing. In fact, it has been placed in humans by God himself. It is the expression of desire that becomes the issue.

As every parent should, Solomon took his son aside to explain human sexuality. He told his son to find his sexual fulfillment, “in the wife of your youth” (v. 18). Solomon’s choice of words is important. It is in the early days of marriage, while the marriage partners still are young, that desire is at its peak. Establishing a means of fulfillment in the early days will bring a recognized opportunity for fulfillment even when beauty fades.

Unfortunately, passion tends to wane in latter years. The desires of youth can become the diversions of middle age. Husbands and wives need to work at maintaining or rediscovering the romance they enjoyed when they were younger.

Recognize what is at stake (Proverbs 6:25-32)

Solomon, one of the wisest men who ever lived, continues to educate his son in Proverbs 6. Here, he outlines the cost of adultery. Solomon says the adulterer, “will not go unpunished” (v. 29). It is uncertain as to the source of the punishment. In Solomon’s time, a person caught in adultery was to be stoned to death (John 8) as payment to society for a crime committed. It also is possible Solomon is referring to a punishment God pronounces. Either way, Solomon’s point is valid; the commission of adultery has dire consequences.

Solomon also gives the instruction to consider the other outcomes of adultery. It leads to financial calamity, “it costs him all the wealth of his house” (v. 31) and the one who commits adultery, “destroys himself”(v. 32) and “his shame will never be wiped away” (v. 33). In any time and in any culture, adultery carries a high price. Infidelity’s price is too high to pay, and its results are to long lasting to consider. If for no other reason, Solomon’s warning should help believers understand the severe consequences of their unfaithful actions.

Conclusion

Unfaithful behavior, whether mental or physical, never is a part of God’s intentions. He intends for one man and one woman to live together in a faithful and monogamous relationship. Adultery has serious consequences. Every married believer must take every possible step to protect the integrity of their marital relationship.