Posted: 11/24/03
Dec. 28
1 John 3.11-18; 23-24; 4.7-21
We love because first we were loved
By Gary Long
Our family, like others, has its own vocabulary and catch phrases. We have two that are exceptionally applicable to these Scriptures. Usually when one of us says “I love you” to another the response is “I love you more,” signaling the beginning of a word-joust that may last for an hour or more. For example, I've been known to walk out the door to come to the office and shout “I love you” to Traci, my wife.
She replies, “I love you more!” The game is on.
I go out to the truck, and on my drive to church call the house on my cell phone. Whether a real person or an answering machine picks up I shout, “I love you more!” and quickly hang up before anyone who answers can respond.
An hour or two later, I'm sitting at my desk, and the phone rings. “I love you more!” is on the other end. You get the picture. It's especially difficult when trying to observe bedtimes on school nights.
The second phrase is “Love ya, mean it!” Which, being translated means, “I love you more than words can express and the usual 'I love you' won't work right now.”
Yes, it is playful, but it is a real and present reminder that the love we have for one another is unlike any other love. It is binding. It is unconditional because we are family. Much of the world seems to understand and even experience this kind of love among families, whether extended or blended. Family ties forge a deeper bond of love than most other relationships in our lives.
However, the text for today calls us to reconsider the districting of our love to tightly zoned familial boundaries. It asserts with resolve and prophetic clarity that genuine Christian love–a command and not an option–is founded on God's love in giving his Son and is characterized by a willingness to give our lives and possessions for other people. This love should provide the overarching narrative for our lives, and this love compels us to the higher righteousness oft cited by Jesus as the way we ought to love our neighbor.
The framework of this week's lesson offers us three venues to consider ways in which the drama of love might be played out as we seek to intertwine the story of our lives with the meta narrative of God as love.
First, we need to look honestly at the ways in which violence is culturally accepted in America and how it runs counter to genuine Christian love (1 John 3:11-18). Second, we should consider that the sacrificial love of a Christian is not a one-time single occurrence, but might be better lived out of the long run in countless ways and times (vv. 23-24). Finally, we need to take a long, hard look at the practical way in which God's love is “down-to-earth love” in the form of Jesus of the manger and Jesus, the Lord of our hearts (4:7-21).
Accepting violence
The first hate crime in recorded history is that of one brother's murder of another. Clearly violent and sinful, Cain's evil murder of Abel ushered in an entirely new way to sin for humanity. The chilling fact is that the violence propagated at that moment in history has been emulated countless times and, tragically, countless more times in film, television and other media.
Cain's way is the way of the world, and I submit that Christians can hardly be distinguished from their non-Christian American counterparts. We gobble up violence like a 6 year old gobbles up Pixie Sticks on All Saints Day. We watch and glaze over, anesthetized to the images of death and gore that we sear onto our brains indelibly and irreversibly. It is no surprise that international perception is that we are a gun-toting, blood-thirsty society that tolerates all sort of violence in our media, but look down our noses incongruously at nudity in art and film in other societies such as Europe. It seems a tad inconsistent.
Remarkably inconsistent in the light of this text. Christians are implored to put down the violent ways of Cain and take up ways that are loving, ways that have no malice or hatred, the seedbed for violence to grow. Ironically, Christians are reminded that true love has been made real by a death. Yet this death is a life given up willingly by Jesus, not seized recklessly like Abel's. It is only in the pattern of giving up life, rather than stealing life, that wholeness is going to be found.
Further, the writer places the sin of ignoring a brother in need (3:17) in the same class and category as the kind of hatred that drove Cain to kill Abel. Is it possible then that apathy is on equal footing with rage and anger in the sin department? The text seems to suggest so.
Laying down our lives continually
1 John further expands the thought of love. The writer claims love is not simply an absence of apathy or anger, but that love has definitive characteristics. Jesus' edict to love one another is a command, a non-negotiable that makes the papal ex cathedra seem like a bulk e-mail you could choose to either delete or forward to your closest online friends. Jesus' edict to love one another, had it been an e-mail, would demand a response. The demand wouldn't be for a response to the e-mail, but a response to humanity in the form of active love. But more importantly, that edict is not a “one time” action or thought but an ongoing way of life.
It would seem from John's writings, as well as a comprehensive look at the teachings of Jesus that discuss laying down our lives for one another, love is not only a one-time act of heroism. We are not being compelled to some sort of sacrificial suicide in order to prove our love for God and neighbor. Rather, love in this light is an ongoing “little by little” process over time.
Family life is the clearest theatre for us to see this drama played out. This might be vividly portrayed if we, as adults, were to ask our parents about the millions of little ways they laid down their lives for our future when we were children.
Just how many soccer games and piano recitals do parents attend to show their love? All of them.
Just how many dishes will a homemaker do over a lifetime, not because he or she loves doing dishes (who does?) but because he or she loves someone? All of them.
How many times does one encourage a discouraged spouse? Every time.
How often are we to give in response to a need? Every time.
It is a complete and total sacrifice of an entire life, not all at once, but an entire lifetime nonetheless. The principal of laying down our lives applies to all our relationships, not just at home, but at work, church, school and most especially in the chance meeting of a stranger. This indeed is the kind of love that involves laying down one's life for another in the name of love. We lay down our lives in love not just once, but millions of times over a lifetime.
Down-to-earth love
All of this talk is meaningless, though, if we fail to recognize the author of this “life-giving” love. It is, of course, God. And the model for this gritty kind of love is God in the form of Jesus. God looked over the expanse of history and at just the perfect time entered into the plane of human existence in a “down-to-earth” kind of way.
In the humblest of forms, a baby, God came to dwell among the chosen Israel in a surprising way. And in a similarly surprising way, we now understand the scope of his ministry, his work on the cross and in the resurrection, and in so doing, we understand God's love in a very real way. When we come to this passage, the writer makes a sudden shift from discussing discernment (4:1-6) to a soaring exhortation on love. Unequalled in its eloquence and splendor, this passage subsumes even the famous “love chapter” of Paul (1 Corinthians 13) in giving us a doctrinally sound understanding of love as modeled by God.
Thirteen times in this passage alone, we find the occurrence of “love” either as a noun or verb. The message is clear. The text dances nimbly in reminding us, yet again, that God is love and God is continually expressing that love. Awe at the nature of this love is the best human response! Not once does this passage tell us that God's love comes through following the rules of Christianity. Not once does the passage speak of God doling out love in response to our obedience or our goodness. Clearly, God is a god of love, and we are the objects and recipients of that love.
What's more, we can reason through the statement “we love because he first loved us” (4:19) and conclude that without the loving existence of God, there would not even be a human capacity for understanding love, much less actually “doing” love. In a round-about way, this text points to the reality of God in the evidence of our own human experience of love.
Questions for discussion
In what ways have you seen that God's love is real? What experiences of giving or receiving love could you tell about that point to the reality of God's love?
Read the account of Cain and Abel in Genesis 4:8-16. Do you find a measure of God's love for Cain in God's punishment? If you said yes, describe that love in single words. Now consider this: In what ways could those same words apply to God's love for you?
What view should Christians have regarding violence in movies, television, etc? What do you think drives our curiosity in violence or bloodshed? How might Christians discern what to “do” with such violence?
Think of people who have “laid down their life” for you along your life's path. Pause to give thanks to God. Then consider how you might do the same for others who need you. How might you become aware of people who need your love?
Marvel at the mystery of the cradle containing God and consider how God's “down-to-earth love” might be a model for you. How might you practice “incarnational” ministry to others by becoming God's “hands and feet”?
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