Cybercolumn for 3/15/04 by Jeanie Miley: Amazing, costly grace_32204
Posted: 3/17/04
CYBERCOLUMN:
Amazing, costly grace
By Jeanie Miley
It was so quiet in the banquet room of the hotel that you could almost hear the blood coursing through peoples’ veins. The speaker owned the room.
Only recently, this man had been released from prison after serving time on Death Row. After decades, he was a free man, thanks to the help of those who never gave up on him and never quit believing in his innocence. My mind struggled to wrap itself around the awfulness of the wasted years. I wept at the thought of how precious freedom must be to him.
| Jeanie Miley |
Most people in the world will never experience either Death Row or the agony of serving time for a crime they didn’t commit, and yet, some of us live our whole lives as if we are under another kind of unseen sentence or in an invisible prison of our own making, held in bondage by chains of fear, guilt or shame. Some of us “free” people are more imprisoned than those who are behind bars.
Some of us get bound up early by negative messages of parents, siblings or early friendships that tell us we aren’t good enough or that we are wrong or inferior, and once that original and unconscious programming is set, it is almost as if we start building our own prisons of self-doubt and self-abuse, chaining ourselves to the opinions of others that we live out in the choices we make in adolescence and adulthood.
Others of us are in bondage to careers or jobs of other peoples’ choosing, and we spend our talents and abilities doing jobs we are not intended to do, simply because we are trying to earn the approval of the people we love or because we didn’t know that we had a choice to do anything else. Some of us waste our own calling, trying to fulfill others’ expectations of us.
Often, and tragically, people get trapped in relationships that are destructive or meaningless, sometimes making decision before they really know what they are doing and then they have to live out the results of that 20-second decision for the rest of their lives.
Sometimes, we get stuck in guilt, and we live our lives doing penance or trying to earn our pardon.
Sometimes, we embroil ourselves in anger and hate and don’t know what to do to get out of that self-destructive pattern that hurts ourselves and others.
Many human beings are locked up in addictions that steal our precious lives and injure the lives of our loved ones.
Some of us buy into a belief system or ideology that traps us in ways that are often so insidious that we don’t even realize that we are, little by little, giving away our God-given power of choice.
The longer I live, the more I know that the One who made us does not intend for any of us to live in bondage, and that the practical, real-life, everyday work of redemption and resurrection is the work of setting us free from whatever it is that binds us to limited and limiting beliefs, habits and behaviors.
The good news of Christ is that resurrection power is available to every one of us, day by grace-filled day. As we accept that radical grace, we are obliged to give it.
What I sensed in that free man was radical, liberating, transforming grace. It is amazing grace that sets all of us prisoners free, and it is a gift.
I want to live that costly grace and give it, here and now.
Jeanie Miley is an author and columnist and a retreat and workshop leader. She is married to Martus Miley, pastor of River Oaks Baptist Church in Houston, and they have three adult daughters.
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