EDITORIAL: Parents must keep eternity in mind_30705
Posted: 3/4/05
EDITORIAL:
Parents must keep eternity in mind
The woeful state of child protection saddens the soul and staggers the imagination. Multiplied thousands of Texas children suffer from abuse and neglect. A package of articles in this issue of the Standard describes that need and details how Baptist General Convention of Texas child care agencies are deployed to help children and strengthen their families.
But while the shortcomings of the state's Child Protective Services grab headlines, many well-meaning Christian parents benignly neglect the eternal spiritual needs of their children. We'll get to that point in a minute.
A new survey sheds light on America's parents. The Barna Group, the religion research organization headed by pollster/author George Barna, conducted the survey late last year.
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Barna asked parents to name the qualities that contribute most significantly to “effectively raising children.” Patience was the No. 1 answer, listed by 36 percent of parents. Other qualities included demonstrating love (cited by 32 percent), enforcing discipline and being understanding (22 percent), faith commitment and identifiable religious beliefs (20 percent), good communication skills (17 percent), compassion (14 percent), listening (12 percent) and intelligence (11 percent).
While only 6 percent said setting goals was significant, parents readily ranked their goals for raising their children. The far-and-away leader was helping their kids get a good education, cited by 39 percent of parents. Second was helping their children feel loved (24 percent), followed by enabling their children to have a meaningful relationship with Jesus Christ (22 percent), security (16 percent), helping children feel affirmed and encouraged (14 percent), providing a firm spiritual foundation (13 percent), delivering basic necessities such as shelter (12 percent) and food (10 percent), and helping their children feel happy (10 percent).
U.S. parents split evenly over whether they teach moral absolutes to their children, with 43 percent affirming moral absolutes and 45 percent denying them.
Unfortunately, the survey shows the faith commitment of parents does not significantly impact how children are raised. “We found that the qualities born-again parents say an effective parent must possess, the outcomes they hope to facilitate in the lives of their children … (are) indistinguishable from the approach taken by parents who are not born again,” Barna reported.
Even more discouraging are Christian parents' attitudes regarding their children's faith. Only 30 percent of born-again parents listed the salvation of their children as critical. “For that emphasis to not be on the radar screen of most Christian parents is a significant reason why most Americans never embrace Jesus Christ as their Savior,” Barna observed. “We know that parents still have a huge influence on the choices their children make, and we also know that most people either accept Christ when they are young or not at all. The fact that most Christian parents overlook this critical responsibility is one of the biggest challenges to the Christian church.”
He's absolutely right.
We understand the pathology of families that need Child Protective Services. Girls raised in this environment tend to be more promiscuous than girls raised in stable homes. Boys raised like this tend to be more violent and less responsible. So, these boys get these girls pregnant and leave them to raise their children alone. And the cycle starts again.
Ironically, Barna's research points to a spiritually destructive pathology in homes where Christian parents never would dream of physically abusing or neglecting their children. In 70 percent of those homes, guiding children to faith in Christ is not a parental priority.
This problem stems from at least two roots: First, too many Christians have an inadequate theology of salvation. They follow the secular stream of thought–being good is good enough. They really don't believe God would allow unredeemed sinners to spend eternity in hell. Second, too many Christian parents think the spiritual nurture of their children is somebody else's job. Just as they leave education to the schools, they leave spiritual nurture to the church. But studies consistently show parents provide the greatest, most lasting influence on their kids.
So, our churches must train parents. We must help them understand the doctrine of salvation by faith in Christ. We must help them accept their responsibility for raising their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Every child who falls through the Child Protective Services safety net suffers dire consequences. Every child who leaves a Christian home without a saving relationship with Jesus Christ may suffer eternal consequences.