Cyber Column by Berry D. Simpson: Weak link

Posted: 9/05/05

CYBER COLUMN:
Weak link

By Berry D. Simpson

Thursday morning, July 21, Tigoni, Kenya: “The best showers in Africa are in the Windsor Club,” said John. He was right. It was even better than the hot showers at the Mission House in Nagela, near Kaabong; we earned those showers hiking for hours across the rough ground of northeast Uganda, then hauling solar-heated water in a yellow plastic five-gallon jerry can to an overhead bucket-and-spout arrangement in the bathroom. The trick, surprisingly enough, was blending enough cool water with the hot to make the shower comfortable. On my first attempt, well, Cyndi and I had to dash back and forth under the water to keep from scalding ourselves.

At Windsor, an excellent facility, I didn’t have to haul any hot water. I remember standing under the large showerhead, volumes of hot water drenching my hair and skin, and thinking: this is just amazing. Even if I had to stand on one foot to keep my left leg extended out of the stream of water so my bandage wouldn’t get wet and come loose. I was still under a nurse’s care for a big blister on my left heal and I knew I’d be in trouble if I lost the bandage. I was sad to be so crippled up that I had to skip the morning run with Cyndi and John and Linda (I worked out in the weight room instead). My knee was still hurting and I had injuries on both feet.

Saturday evening, July 16, Nagela, Uganda: it was my worst time, most depressing time, during the entire Africa adventure. I was feeling sorry for myself; feeling like unnecessary baggage. Because my knee was hurting after Friday’s long walk to Lochom I couldn’t make the trip to Lopelpel on Saturday, a 20-mile round trip. And because I didn’t go, Cyndi couldn’t go either. There was some concern that the villagers might think she was John’s wife and not my wife, and it would be too distracting to explain it over and over.

I also had a quarter-sized blister on my left ankle, and I could feel another blister-in-the-making under my right big toe. And if those weren’t enough, somewhere along the way I kicked a stump or a rock and bruised my left big toe under my toenail. Saturday morning I drained the fluid from under my toenail, put band aids on my blisters, and wore my knee brace so we could walk around the area surrounding the mission house and into Kaabong town. I was embarrassed to be the weak link in the group. I knew John didn’t expect any of us to walk with him step for step day after day, but I was dismayed to break down so quickly.

I came to Africa knowing my knee would give me fits sooner or later. I planned to keep walking on it as long as I could, and then put on my knee brace and walk some more. I figured I could tough out anything for one week. John and Jacob and Tubo and Losilo would be walking every day; I wanted to do my share. Walking is such an important part of this mission effort, and I was determined to be part of it.

Well, the next morning I was feeling much better; I switched from blaming myself to damage control. I put duct tape over the bandages and had no further blister problems after that. I knew I’d l probably lose my big toenail after we got back home to Midland, but I’ve lost them before and it’s no big deal. I wore my knee brace the remainder of the hikes to remind me to be careful while crossing the plowed fields.

And so, standing in the wonderful hot shower at Windsor, I wondered:

What was the message from all these injuries? What was I supposed to learn?

Maybe it was a simple reminder that my effectiveness to God does not depend on being tough, or using my skills, or being strong. Rather it depended on my humility and willingness, and on God Himself.

Standing in the shower I prayed: Lord, I’m sorry for thinking I can do anything from sheer willpower. I’m wrong, and it’s a sin for me to think that way. You called us to Africa. This trip was Your idea. We never would’ve thought about an international trip only one month after Katie’s wedding. You called us to Africa to bring honor and glory to You, to lift up Your name, and I confess I’ve gotten in Your way. Please forgive me. Please heal my knee, my toe, my blisters. Please keep the rest of me together and don’t let me fall apart any more. Please let me walk and talk and live in such a way that You are glorified. Amen.

Berry Simpson, a Sunday school teacher at First Baptist Church in Midland, is a petroleum engineer, writer, runner and member of the city council in Midland. You can contact him through e-mail at berry@stonefoot.org.